Sunday, March 30, 2008
the third year's Ching Ming.
the third year's Ching Ming.
Went for Ching Ming praying this day. I never expected the feeling will be so strong. This was the third year. Papa left.
6.30am-woke up from sleep. I am dizzy all the way some caused by menstrual and also not enough sleep as I only able get to sleep around 4am in the morning.
7.30am-1st uncle picked us up to his home while waiting for 2nd uncle from bangsar. My stomach was painful on that time, suffering. Drank Milo and have some pain killer with warm water. It could comfort me for a little. We start our journey to graveyard around 8am. There was a serious traffic jam. We go for grandpa at 1st. The 1st time I am feeling so weak. Done the pray then we continue our journey to grandma and papa side. At last, we decided to have our brunch because of cant stand to the jam and also hungrier.
Here, I saw something which tears my heart apart. I had missed papa so much. Papa was just so same with two of my uncles till seeing them will be always reminding me of papa. 1st uncle was chit chat with my cousin, his daughter. The word, the sound, the action, gave me an illusion-liked I could able to see right in front of, papa was doing all that always also by my side last time. I can felt my eyes getting wet. I know I am going to tears. After finish our brunch, we continue to the graveyard which mention just now. I fall asleep inside the car as the car flow was just without moving.
We reached to the familiar place finally. There was so crowded. Eyes were suffering by the smoke from combustion; but it does help me to tears unknowingly. This day we were not searching so hard then can get two places for praying purpose. One for grandma, another one for papa. It was freaking hot over there, skin just liked burning.
Went without uncle and their family the feeling was just fine, because that way would not recall my memories. Continuous three years, every years, I will felt sad because last time papa will be the one who bringing us doing all this. (Go to the graveyard praying, what we have to do, and the main thing-papa was bringing us to pray grandpa and grandma last time; and now, we were praying him.) I still remember how the way daddy pampers me is. I was acting liked a spoiled brat, wanting loves and cares in daddy arms. I was a very little girl that time, with a light weight, daddy brings me up to view grandma photo up on the rack as I can’t get to view it just by my height, daddy told me all about grandma, I remembered hardly. As the weather will be freaking hot every time Ching Ming, me and bro will always making noise wanted ice-cream treated by daddy. I was just passing by the ice-cream stall just now. My tear was invisible, *because it is dropping deep inside my heart.* How I am going to let go as the memories was followed me so closely? ='(
This year Ching Ming more shows to me my sadness. I am just a helpless girl always. I was just a girl which lost daddy, for three years already. I was just…
Missed papa*
Needed papa*
Wanted *LOVES & CARES*
Baby elephant.
30.03.2008
6.30am-woke up from sleep. I am dizzy all the way some caused by menstrual and also not enough sleep as I only able get to sleep around 4am in the morning.
7.30am-1st uncle picked us up to his home while waiting for 2nd uncle from bangsar. My stomach was painful on that time, suffering. Drank Milo and have some pain killer with warm water. It could comfort me for a little. We start our journey to graveyard around 8am. There was a serious traffic jam. We go for grandpa at 1st. The 1st time I am feeling so weak. Done the pray then we continue our journey to grandma and papa side. At last, we decided to have our brunch because of cant stand to the jam and also hungrier.
Here, I saw something which tears my heart apart. I had missed papa so much. Papa was just so same with two of my uncles till seeing them will be always reminding me of papa. 1st uncle was chit chat with my cousin, his daughter. The word, the sound, the action, gave me an illusion-liked I could able to see right in front of, papa was doing all that always also by my side last time. I can felt my eyes getting wet. I know I am going to tears. After finish our brunch, we continue to the graveyard which mention just now. I fall asleep inside the car as the car flow was just without moving.
We reached to the familiar place finally. There was so crowded. Eyes were suffering by the smoke from combustion; but it does help me to tears unknowingly. This day we were not searching so hard then can get two places for praying purpose. One for grandma, another one for papa. It was freaking hot over there, skin just liked burning.
Went without uncle and their family the feeling was just fine, because that way would not recall my memories. Continuous three years, every years, I will felt sad because last time papa will be the one who bringing us doing all this. (Go to the graveyard praying, what we have to do, and the main thing-papa was bringing us to pray grandpa and grandma last time; and now, we were praying him.) I still remember how the way daddy pampers me is. I was acting liked a spoiled brat, wanting loves and cares in daddy arms. I was a very little girl that time, with a light weight, daddy brings me up to view grandma photo up on the rack as I can’t get to view it just by my height, daddy told me all about grandma, I remembered hardly. As the weather will be freaking hot every time Ching Ming, me and bro will always making noise wanted ice-cream treated by daddy. I was just passing by the ice-cream stall just now. My tear was invisible, *because it is dropping deep inside my heart.* How I am going to let go as the memories was followed me so closely? ='(
This year Ching Ming more shows to me my sadness. I am just a helpless girl always. I was just a girl which lost daddy, for three years already. I was just…
Missed papa*
Needed papa*
Wanted *LOVES & CARES*
Baby elephant.
30.03.2008
Precious you
1:51 PM |